Opposites


Have you ever noticed that what we often need is the opposite of what the “pain” makes us think?

I recently had a minor knee injury that I avoided handling when it was starting until it became much more painful and made me limp. In my stubborn and misguided mindset I thought I could just “walk it off”. In the end I did some doctoring and began working with a physical therapist. On more than just the physical level I found what I needed in the very thing I had avoided. The injury is healing nicely and progress is quick.

And in the midst of this physical situation I learned about life in general.You see, when my hamstring was suffering I learned I need to strengthen the thigh in the front. When my back is weak I need to strengthen my abs. It’s a matter of balance and compensation. It makes sense once I realized that one was compensating for the pain in the other and carrying all the weight. In order to mend I need to lean on the strength of the healthy muscles and build up the weaker ones.

And so it is in many ways. When we feel lonely we often withdraw instead of reaching out. When we are in pain we sometimes lash out for protection instead of asking for help. We push away those who love us in fear that they will hurt us. Do you recognize yourself in any of these scenarios? What is really true is we need to build the “other muscle” in order to heal and get what we need. It’s a simple concept but one that we talk ourselves out of for ego or fear-based reasons.

What if we knew we could trust? What if we knew we would receive help? What if our needs were not secret but rather they became satisfied. All good things to ponder.  So, what do you think?

Share and be blessed!

7 thoughts on “Opposites

  1. I know people who had many good people in their lives, even close relationships, but they would get a sense that someone was tired of listening to them, because the person in need tried to soft coat their need, or pretend everything was ok. Our society has become so self-absorbed, even unintentionally, and just can’t read between the lines of a person’s words, or connect the dots of their silence. The person must have felt unloved, invisible…then just couldn’t take it any more. So sad.
    I hope to be there for anyone who needs to talk, and try to be more conscious of others and their feelings or their silence. I would like to be a part of helping someone to see the brighter side of life and that they matter.

  2. You are very wise Barb. This is so true. One extended issue from what you say “When we feel lonely we often withdraw instead of reaching out. When we are in pain we sometimes lash out for protection instead of asking for help. We push away those who love us in fear that they will hurt us.” Many times we don’t ask for help because we did before and got nothing, we feel no one really cares, everyone is so busy they don’t want to take the time to even let someone talk.

    And we wonder why people commit suicide.

    • Hi Ann – you are right on the last point. Who we choose to reach out to is important. If they are also withdrawing in their heart that is not a combination that will work. We have to build the relationships before we need them and sometimes we skip that step. It’s such an important one. And never give up. That takes courage. So much courage.

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