Tag Archive | relationships

Hello again ….


Hello again!

It has been a while since I last posted. Changing jobs can create much upheaval  – packing, moving stuff, examining our things – making choices to keep or toss, learning new places and people and priorities. That transition certainly does change our focus. But alas, I am writing again before I move into a several week cycle of travel.

486538_557664290934612_1208784165_nI must admit the autumn air is bringing me to life. I have long known that my life cycle seems to begin in the fall of the year. The colors and smells bring me joy. The activities – football games that I can hear from the nearby high school, the smell of leaves and fireplaces delight my senses, and the crispness of the air brings me back to hearth and home. I love it. I am in my little bit of heaven this time of year. It’s the only time of year that I’m drawn to the color orange – it is the cloak of the autumn trees and it sprinkles itself in accessories throughout my home. A short-lived decor but one that brings me joy.

And I’ve been having much fun with my daughter as she makes her choices for her December 2014 wedding. Luckily I learned a bunch from going through the wedding process with my son and his new wife this past summer. The long lead-time for my daughter’s special date is making the process feel more relaxed and less hectic – for now! I feel blessed that both of my children have chosen wonderful life mates. They are all unique and yet all compatible in the right ways. I pray that their relationships continue to grow toward each other as the years move on.

What are the blessings in your life these days – I’d love to hear more from you.

Be blessed!

 

Conquer with Love – original poem


CONQUER WITH LOVE

Fire-Love-Images-Background-HD-WallpaperWhen evil seers a hole into the fabric of our lives,

It does not account for the power of light and love

To enter through that ragged wound.

What hate cuts and scratches to destroy,

Kindness and generosity stitches back a stronger whole.

There is no place that darkness can hide

For it is your light that can illuminate all.

Fear would cause us to shrink back and not live as we design,

But strength of connection creates bravery to step out.

Let us not fight with anger but rather conquer with love.

We are in control – not of what happens to us

But of who we reach out to for help and for comfort.

We can overcome the hatred in this world

If we but make a greater counter play of love.

Hate not, but forgive.

Shrink not, but join.

Revenge not, but console.

Let us seek to heal the defeated before they turn cold and bitter.

Let us defeat the hatred that seeks to create more haters.

Let us be love, do love, speak love and seek love.

~ Barbara Bernard Miller

537861_10151289736555834_294667259_n

I have nothing to say …


nothing-to-sayI was saddened yesterday by a casual exchange. I wasn’t sad for me, mind you, but for a “reality” that one of my friends was claiming for herself.

You see, I was chatting with an old friend – catching up and enjoying each other’s company. The subject turned to hobbies and I mentioned my blogging here. While I don’t get to write every day I do come back here as often as I can to read, write, and stir a little positive into the pot of life. Her response to this is what made me sad.

She said, “Oh I could never do that, I have nothing to say.”

Wow. Upon further conversation, I found she actually believed just that.  I’ve heard lot’s of responses – I don’t have time, I’m not a good writer, I don’t like sharing on the internet, etc. All understandable and reasonable. But for someone to live their life, this precious experience on earth, and to truly believe they have “nothing to say”, well it saddens me. I have no expectations that everyone should want to blog or write articles or books or become public speakers. Nor do I expect people to scream their truth upon the mountain top or into the world wide web. But there is something for her to say … to friends, family, loved ones. There is wisdom in her living that is best  utilized in its sharing.

The truth is – I would love to hear anything she has to say. She has deep faith, she has admirable accomplishments, she has experiences in business and in community volunteering. She has children she’s raised and ideas she’s brought to fruition. But what she doesn’t have is confidence. She lacks the understanding that SHE has importance and what SHE says is of interest. But I know that her big and small things have value in their telling. Stories are important – it’s how we communicate values, feelings, progress, ideas, and changes in relationships and so much more. She has SO MUCH to say but she doesn’t put value on it. There lies the root problem that has caused my sadness. This beautiful human being who is loved by many doesn’t see her value and therefore feels she has nothing to say that has value.

silenceOne of my basic tenets of belief, in life and in my experience in the field of Human Resources, is that everyone has a voice and should be encouraged to find it. I will continue to encourage my friend to find and value hers.

Do you know others who believe they have “nothing to say?” How do you encourage them to find their voice?  Hand them the pen, the microphone, the telephone, or simply lend them an ear …. and be blessed!

Interdependency


Today I had a conversation with a friend about “interdependency”.

You hear alot about co-dependency which really is an ineffective, disempowering way for us to go about life.  But interdependency is so much different.

Interdependency is about trust, accountability, and support.  When we are interdependent we must trust that the other person will keep their commitments and do their part of the equation.  We must hold ourselves and each other accountable for our areas of expertise and our promises to bring that to the task at hand.  And lastly we must agree to be a support to each other when it’s time for an “all hands on deck” call for help.  It is powerful and empowering to know that we can build upon each others’ strength to fulfill the need at hand.  That is interdependency.  That’s how relationships, friendships, marriages, families, communities and companies actually work in a healthy and forward-moving fashion.

Does this line up with your truth?  Are you living in a co-dependent or interdependent fashion?