Tag Archive | surprise

Just another day in paradise …


I’m so glad that God still performs miracles! He does them every day and thankfully I try to be aware of them. I know I miss some along the way by being busy and distracted. However, some are just too HUGE to miss. Yesterday I received one of those – BIG, really very BIG!

I’ve shared on my blog that I am adopted. I spent ages 3-8 in the orphanage and was adopted by a lovely family. I don’t even think about being adopted anymore really – they are simply my family. I spent most of my life turning my back on my painful past and keeping my eyes on my good fortune and the love this family showered me with. I was saved and I have no idea how or why. God plucked me from a hellish situation and gave me another path to walk. Leaving the past behind me worked for me as I got to create myself anew.

However, as I’m dancing in my middle age I have been gradually collecting blessings as I reconcile my past and my present. I realized along the way that there is enough love in me to keep my family and to reconnect with those in my birth family as well. And last night I reconnected a little bit more.

It was a quiet evening – just me and my puppies sitting by my fire trying to figure out what to watch on TV. One of my regained sisters, Lynnette, called me out of the blue. I’m thankful to have reconnected with her but we don’t get a chance to talk much (not nearly enough). She said “get in your car and come now”. She went on to tell me that my “baby brother” who lives in Texas and drives a big rig was about 90 minutes away from her house and was stopping on his way through. Wow! Now that was not a call I was expecting to get. So into my car I got and I drove the 50 minutes to her house. It was a multiple event as this was my first time meeting her lovely children and wonderful husband. That was momentous enough.

Then we hopped in her car and drove to the rest stop an exit away where he was to meet her. Of course she didn’t tell him I was coming but it was a wonderful surprise! I cannot describe in words what it feels like to look into the eyes of someone you’ve not seen for 43 years since he was a babe in arms. I cannot articulate the blessing and the healing that happens in that miraculous moment. Even with my command of words and love of using them … I cannot describe it.

I am bone tired but happy for the conversation into the wee hours of the night. I am blessed to know that the pains of childhood really can be released in adulthood. I am so awed that in the midst of craziness and hardship, this man turned out to be a warm, genuine, sweet man. The miracles just don’t stop happening when you are hanging out here in paradise.

Hugs your siblings, hold them tight … and be blessed!

New-found Blessing – original poem


“NEW-FOUND BLESSING”

There was a day that changed my soul and it happened with a word.

From fantasy to truth at last, and I felt my spirit turn.

I hadn’t seen you in this light and you caught me by surprise.

With both confession and revelation I was opening my eyes.

It wasn’t fear I felt this time but a subtle recognition.

I saw you for the first time and not the apparition.

I mourned the one I knew before although they were not you.

Suddenly the world felt raw and I wasn’t sure what to do.

Then I felt emotion surge inside my heart again.

It was the truth that stirred my soul and I pray a quiet amen.

This was all I wanted, the story that was real.

And having it made an instant path for my head and heart to heal.

Now day by day and inch by inch I love the truth I see.

Your heart and hurt and hope are growing closer to meet me.

The connection is strong and surprisingly flows with gentle ease.

And I find you on my heart and mind as I pray upon my knees.

The future path is open wide and I see such possibilities.

Let’s sow the seeds we wish to grow with love and gentle peace.

For who you are is a gift from God which I cannot deny.

And I shall quiet my mind for now and cease to question why.

Now it’s time for me to live and stop the constant guessing.

Because this seems to be the time to count my new-found blessing.

~ Barbara Bernard Miller

Shhhhhh … it’s a secret!


I LOVE surprises!

I know not everyone does but I feel like a giddy child when I’m in the process of planning one. My senses are on heightened alert for any chance to be found out. I smile … alot, and sometimes spontaneously let out a giggle just knowing that someone I love is going to receive just the perfect something. When it’s a really good one I have to cover my mouth to keep from blurting the delicious details.

I love the thrill of the hunt best of all. As an avid bargain shopper it’s even a colossally bigger joy if I find what I’m looking for on sale. Sometimes I linger in this exciting phase for months, just crawling out of my skin for the secret keeping. Oh, how I savor the covert planning! And as with all self-respecting extroverts with a secret surprise, I always have to find a friend or family member with whom I can conspire. It’s fun to whisper, pass winks and knowing glances, sometimes right in front of the surprisee when they don’t even recognize it. It’s a rich and heady thing, this keeping of secrets.

And right now … I HAVE A SURPRISE!  I just might burst for having to wait to deliver it, but wait I must. If you hear a random giggle or snort, yep it just might be me. teehee!