I was saddened yesterday by a casual exchange. I wasn’t sad for me, mind you, but for a “reality” that one of my friends was claiming for herself.
You see, I was chatting with an old friend – catching up and enjoying each other’s company. The subject turned to hobbies and I mentioned my blogging here. While I don’t get to write every day I do come back here as often as I can to read, write, and stir a little positive into the pot of life. Her response to this is what made me sad.
She said, “Oh I could never do that, I have nothing to say.”
Wow. Upon further conversation, I found she actually believed just that. I’ve heard lot’s of responses – I don’t have time, I’m not a good writer, I don’t like sharing on the internet, etc. All understandable and reasonable. But for someone to live their life, this precious experience on earth, and to truly believe they have “nothing to say”, well it saddens me. I have no expectations that everyone should want to blog or write articles or books or become public speakers. Nor do I expect people to scream their truth upon the mountain top or into the world wide web. But there is something for her to say … to friends, family, loved ones. There is wisdom in her living that is best utilized in its sharing.
The truth is – I would love to hear anything she has to say. She has deep faith, she has admirable accomplishments, she has experiences in business and in community volunteering. She has children she’s raised and ideas she’s brought to fruition. But what she doesn’t have is confidence. She lacks the understanding that SHE has importance and what SHE says is of interest. But I know that her big and small things have value in their telling. Stories are important – it’s how we communicate values, feelings, progress, ideas, and changes in relationships and so much more. She has SO MUCH to say but she doesn’t put value on it. There lies the root problem that has caused my sadness. This beautiful human being who is loved by many doesn’t see her value and therefore feels she has nothing to say that has value.
One of my basic tenets of belief, in life and in my experience in the field of Human Resources, is that everyone has a voice and should be encouraged to find it. I will continue to encourage my friend to find and value hers.
Do you know others who believe they have “nothing to say?” How do you encourage them to find their voice? Hand them the pen, the microphone, the telephone, or simply lend them an ear …. and be blessed!