Share the Good Stuff!

Used to be when I opened up my FB account I would brace myself for the barrage of negativity, politics, blame, shame, and drama. I had hundreds of friends, and friends of friends, and acquaintances of friends – oh the list was long. Funny how that seemed like it meant something at one time. Oh how I make myself laugh sometimes. And I tried to keep up with what they said and respond and influence. I wasn’t about pushing all that stuff out but I sure did take it in. And I found that it was hurting my heart to do so. That was several years ago. That was not sustainable (thank goodness!)

Today, when I go to that space of cyber connection I go with a smile. What changed you say? I DID! Once I woke up to the idea that I did not have to see what others see, post what others post, spread what others share, or keep the connections I’d made just because I had them in this pretend world we call the internet … I took back control.  Just like I have in my “real life”. I changed the way I interface with people on the internet. I now eliminate the negative – actively and deliberately.

I have shifted from the position of taking it all in, to now only doing selective, “boutique” shopping on my FB connections. I only go for the high-end, quality stuff now. I decided that if I am going to trade precious moments of my life, I better make it worth trading for. So I go where the joy is – if it makes me smile, feel good, invokes inspiration, calls me to positive action, or uplifts others then I’m in. With that decision, miraculously another universal principle started to creep in – what you seek is what you find. I went searching for positive pages to join or follow. I started paying attention to the energy of the people I connect with and with blessings I let many of them go. I started adding to the mix with my own positive messages of joy, kindness, inspiration and love. I use my book’s FB page – Mighty Inspiration for the sole purpose of sending out positive messages. And I created a group – Gifts of Gratitude with the intention of celebrating with each other that which blesses our lives. I have seen that when we share our blessings, they multiply and spread. Who knows, I may create more in the future. What I do know for sure – it has made all the difference!

I am always open for more positivity and more love to flow into my life.  Do you have a favorite page, link, message of positive connectivity you’d like to share? Share the good stuff and be blessed!

Fickle emotions of New Year’s Eve

Emotions are fickle – have you ever noticed? I live my life as an upbeat, positive person looking at the silver linings and expecting the best from life and those who are in it. It somehow surprises me when the disappointments come … and yet on the other hand, maybe not. I’ve spent many hours and years working to improve myself and my relationship with this thing called life. I know more than I think, I understand a lot about myself and hope to know what I need about others – at least I’m always learning. And, I’m acutely aware that it’s all an illusion. And yet, I still find myself waking up on days like today feeling melancholy. The voids in my life seem to be deeper and wider – more pronounced for some reason.

There is fun to be had for sure – for goodness sake it’s New Year’s Eve! This past year, 2013, has been a gloriously blessed year for me. I celebrated my 50th birthday with the love of family and friends giving back to community. I have met new friends, added a daughter-in-law to my family, traveled to parts of the world I have only always dreamed of. It has been a fabulous time. There have been heartaches, mostly in the form of soul friends crossing to the next adventure before me. I know I’ll see them again so I celebrate the gift they have been in my life.

There’s just something kind of sad about this day of crossing over. It’s not fear, it’s not worry, it’s just a silly, fickle emotion. I will sit with it for a brief time to try to discern the lesson in it. I will not wallow – sadness just isn’t a very good friend.

And then I will shake off this melancholy visitor to get back to my celebratory self. I will don a goofy hat and tweet the kazoo of a New Year party favor as I ring in the new year with friends and family. For tomorrow I know the sun shines on the dawn of a new year. There is no magic in the change from one day to the next … simply a choice to start afresh. Set new goals. Begin new adventures. Love more. Be more. Create more.

No matter what emotion is visiting you today – I wish you blessings of the mind, heart, and spirit for 2014. Happy New Year!! See you on the other side!

 

 

Digging out of the funk!

Well, last week was a week of lessons for me. While I’m certainly not perfect at it, I consider myself to be a friendly, upbeat, and positive person. I love that my words have been inspirational to some, and my friendship has been comforting to others as well. My sense of humor goes a long way most of the time and it helps me to make friends pretty easily wherever I go. And I’m grateful for that.

But last week I came face-to-face with a situation with a couple of people that took the wind out of my sails. My usual ‘charm’ clearly wasn’t working. And I found myself in a situation where my heart was hurting and I was sliding into a “funk” because of the repeated negative interactions. How the heck did I get here? How on earth was I going to make it better? And would it even matter if I tried?!

I have a strong faith and I certainly turned that way. I have a few dear friends who lent an ear and shined their perspective on the situation. All of these were good, but I couldn’t seem to shake off the funk. Then I started to think about that “law of attraction” stuff I have so often read about and certainly believe in. So I decided to try this … I started reading only positive things, speaking positive things, seeking and sharing positive things. And that’s how I found myself digging out. Today, I feel like the shift has happened. It wasn’t instant but it was profound. My smile is back. My optimism has returned. I feel like I found a tool that I knew about but never really had to utilize before. It’s not magic, it’s just the unarguable law of nature – you attract to yourself that which you put out into the world. And, as the bible says, “seek and you shall find.”

What do you use to dig yourself out of an emotional ‘funk’?

I have witnessed a coup!

The World Choir Games have come to the U.S. for the first time in their history. And lucky for us, they came to Cincinnati. What a cultural coup!! Cincinnati is already a wonderful city from an arts and culture standpoint. The influx of international musical talent has taken it to another level. Affectionately now known as the “City that Sings”, we have been fortunate to host over 200 events, with 23 categories. Choirs ranged from very young to seniors and came to our fair town from all corners of the globe.

I was fortunate to attend 2 of the events – the first was one of the free Friendship concerts where I got to see the talents from my alma mater, McAuley High School and my son’s alma mater, LaSalle High School. That was a fun way to support the local talent and get a “dip” into the World Choir Games festivities. Congratulations for winning the Silver in your category McAuley & LaSalle!

Today I was thrilled to see the Champion’s Concert featuring this week’s winners.  I enjoyed the humor of our MC, Drew Lachey, former singer in the boy band 98 Degrees, and winner of season 2 of Dancing with the Stars. Drew and his brother Nick, who is one of the Masters of Ceremonies for the entire event, are local singing talent that add a modern musical touch to our city. And the performances we saw today – all I can say is WOW!!!! It was so apparent why each of these groups was judged to be the best of their category. I was brought to tears a couple of times as the groups laid their talents and their voices on the stage for the sold-out crowd to appreciate. I was honored to see all of these performers of the 2012 World Choir Games! The ending was especially grand with the Kearsney College Choir of South Africa who won the Folk category. The power, passion, dance, and voices made a spectacular end to the day. STUNNING!

Only the closing ceremonies are left and I wish I could be there to see it.

Yes, indeed, the World Choir Games was a positive coup that allowed us to build bridges between cultures and create a positive musical atmosphere for all who participated.

Sing a song, make a joyful noise, and be blessed!

Expansion and Shrinkage

I have been watching and noticing the stories in our world these days. I am so aware of the great dichotomy that exists in our cultural and communal conscience. On one hand we have the expansion of fear. On the rise is disappointment, danger, disregard, and disrespect. The news makes me nearly breathless with the stories of evil acts and heartbreaking sadness. I know the dark is growing but really, do we need the microscopic details? Does it do us good to see the gore and analyze the wickedness? The swelling madness is a symptom but it is not our truth. At least, I think not.

And, on the opposing side we see the shrinkage of hope. There is so much attention and focus on the shriveling economy and the descending  doom that we can scarcely catch a breath. We can see a kind deed if we look but it is hidden from first glance. And I find very few people willing to take the action to coax it into the fullness of possibility. Are you looking for the small hope to grow in your life? My desire is to see the shrinking hope expand to a pulsing, powerful movement of positivity.

We have the power to reverse the tide. We have within our hands and mouths the power to change the way we connect. Do a kind deed. Speak a kind word. Create a tiny ripple, and then a wave of positive change. All it takes is the enticement of your true creative and positive nature to raise itself up and lead.

Are you up for the challenge? Do you see the opportunity for hope and possibility in your life? Expand and be blessed!

Just Speak – original poem

JUST SPEAK!

From stem to stern and back again.

Top to bottom, without end.

Your cells know the energy of a positive flow.

Your words bellow forth with new life.

The sentiment of your heart changes the air.

Every part of you responding to the beat of your cares.

With heavy heart the day goes dark.

With lightness of hope the day glows.

It isn’t the outside that colors your world.

But the rainbow of thoughts and words.

With practice your mind can shift your view.

Allowing the breaking of dawn.

Brushing aside the darkest of thoughts.

You harness the power of control.

With it comes swift changes to your world.

It’s your words that speak your thoughts to life.

As your energy entwines with others.

A thought, a word, a positive shift.

Is all it takes to change your path.

From slowly slipping away with regret.

To a warm embrace of belonging.

It only takes one act from you.

You have the power within.

To shift the story of who you are.

Just speak your life to your dreams.

It changes everything.

~ Barbara Bernard Miller

Perceptions and Change

Many of my friends are going through significant life changes these days. Some are by choice, but many are being pushed, prodded, cajoled, or even forced into it.  Perhaps it has always been this way … but I think it’s happening more and more. Well, that’s my perception anyway. The beautiful thing about perceptions is they can be changed with  more facts and more experiences.

What I’ve been observing is that even though change is change, my friends’ perceptions of it makes all the difference in the world. My question is – does it have to be this way? The  “how” you came to be in the midst of change (voluntary, involuntary, dreams, or the end of dreams) … should that really change our interaction with the shift? No matter the “why”, the “what” is still the same.

The stages of change are still the same. The things you can and cannot control are essentially the same. The connections with friends, family, and networks is identical. The steps to take from “here” to “there” are virtually indistinguishable. What is different is the perception of the change. Because of that, I think we hold the key to smoother transitions.

I learned long ago to tease apart the facts of the matter from the story we tell ourselves about the fact. Facts are neutral. They are simply the details of what happened. But the stories are where our paranoias, fantasies, dreams, suspicions, and imaginations come to life. For example, when I was 3 I was ordered by the Courts to be a ward of the State and was placed in an orphanage. Everything in that sentence is a fact. However, I spent years telling myself the story that I must have been one really unlovable child because no-one loved me and I didn’t have a family. WOW! That is a 3 year old’s story based on what I could see and what I could understand and what I could possibly imagine. And, in reality it wasn’t true. Clearly I was loveable – I had lots of friends at the orphanage, I had brothers and sisters at the orphanage, the nuns used to tell me they loved me, and a wonderful family adopted me. And yet, for years (into my 30’s) I repeated, and believed, that I was unloveable. Once I learned this whole concept about how we create barriers in our lives by our storytelling (fact vs. story) it stopped me in my tracks. Because I had made up the story, I could revisit the facts and tell a different, more plausible story. I wasn’t in the orphanage because I was unloveable, or frankly because of anything I had done at all. It was because of the actions of my parents and the decisions of the judge. Changing my perception of the facts actually freed me from fears, self-doubt, and anger. And it happened in a moment. Not in a week, not over time, not through therapy and not in lingering bits. It was instantaneous. And that was the moment I stopped giving away my joy, my worth, my purpose and my self-esteem. That’s how powerful our perceptions are.

And over time, I continue to relook at my “truths” and stories to re-evaluate the facts. It has been the single most healing learned wisdom in my life. I’m grateful that I had the opportunity to learn it in my 30’s vs. in my later life.

So I ask you, are you in the midst of change? What are the facts (who, what, where, when, how)? What stories are you telling yourself (why)? Are you assigning intent and blame? Are you suspicious and fearful?  What if … in this very moment … you changed your story from something that was “done unto you” with maliciousness or for negative reasons, and retold it as a shift in opportunity, or a divine intervention, or simply as a season ending. What if you have learned and received all you need or can from that circumstance. What if the future is brighter than the now. What if the “why” did not drive your reactions or how you go through the change. What if …

I pray for those who’s change is upon them. May it be a smooth, gentle, positive adventure. And may you be blessed on the journey.

Power of the Universe revisited

I woke up this morning knowing that I need to step graciously and positively into my day. I have a presentation to make that will be a message of joy to some and create apprehension in others. It’s an important meeting. It’s also important how I show up and how I deliver the content.

Because of this I was feeling a bit jittery, even after my morning prayers. I’m not one to be nervous about speaking in front of a group, but I do want to be thoughtful and effective, especially today. So with that mindset I stopped out here at my blog with the intention of centering my thoughts on something positive. God certainly does delight me with little surprises. I saw on my stats all the folks that had read my home page. And there was one someone in the world who had read a different one of my posts. I clicked on it and realized that it was exactly what I needed to re-read for today. It’s the Power of the Universe posting.

It reminds me of who I am and the power I have. In short order I felt my nerves calming as I remembered who I am and the connection I have to the Divine. Check it out and see if it sparks something in you today.

Be the greatest you can possibly be … and be blessed!

Inspired Action

I have noticed that my years seem to flow in themes. I started to see this about 3-4 years ago. Since gaining awareness, I also know that these are not themes which I pick, but rather what appears to be the “lesson of the year.” Sometimes the theme reveals itself quite quickly, and other times I see it only in retrospect. They are also wildly variant – from a year of learning (both formal and informal), to spiritual listening, to accepting my personal value, to surrender, etc. This year is shaping up to be the year of inspired action.

Just saying those words, inspired action, makes me both excited and a little nervous. I’m not going to lie, it takes courage to take action when it’s purpose driven. It means I can’t “go with the flow of my emotions” like I desire. It means having a bit of a plan, taking risks, showing my intentions to people. But, in spite of my desire to hesitate, I know that this is the course I’m on.

So what does inspired action look like? Here’s a few examples I’ve come across already:

> Speaking out in support of what’s right in the workplace as it pertains to the gay community at work. Nope, it’s not about religion, but about what’s right from an employee relations and human relations point of view.

> Sharing my spiritual experience and gifting my book to some very influential people in my life.

> Deliberately planting positive messages in the workplace as a way of leaving a legacy.

> Delving into the dark crevices of my heart and soul, really looking at some of the pain points in order to move to forgiveness and emotional healing.

> Purging my home of things I’ve held dear for so long because they no longer serve me.

These are just a few, and they aren’t all easy. But I know that in the end I will gain personal power from the process. This year of inspired action will set me up for what comes next year.

Do you recognize the themes in your life? Awaken your awareness and be blessed!

Until Now!

I had a wonderful conversation this weekend that really made me stop and pause. I’m still taking it all in actually but the 2 words she gave me are tiny in “stature” but huge in significance. “Until Now!”

Do you see the power in this? No matter what my complaints about my life, my body, my self esteem, my troubles, my …. whatever, can all be punctuated with the words, “until now”. Until now, that was my story, or that was my reality. Until now I had limits (mostly self-imposed). Until now I struggled. Until now I didn’t see the big picture. Until now.

With that ending of the sentence, I can begin a new way. Now, and going forward I can envision and declare a new way to be and feel and act and react. I am forever grateful for the positive, loving permission to change that “until now” affords me. Thank you Cynthia Segal. Your words and wisdom are powerful and empowering.

“Until now” is changing my life! Will you allow it to change yours too?

Be blessed!